Blast from the past: Happy New Year 2007

I kept hearing weird voices. "If you don't stop it, I'll take everything!" Somehow I thought that God was talking to me but I just closed my ears. Then, it happened. I lost everything in a blink of an eye. It was supposed to be a happy new year but it was not for me. My love flew away; my heart just shut down. If there was someone to blame, it would be me. My career life did not do any better either; I have been collecting my rejection letters. It was a complete breakdown; I had nothing else to lose. Never in my life I felt that sad and lonely; it was so hard especially at bedtimes. But I think there was beauty in it. It made me stop for a while and try to analyze my life. I kept thinking why was I so unlovable? I realized that it was not because nobody wanted to but nobody can. I never let them. So I had to start from myself. I had to take care and love myself before I can start giving and receiving from others. I also realized that mind came first; others would follow. I had to start from my mind because everything I do and feel start from my brain. I forced myself to deconstruct my brain and tried to look diabetes not as a disease but as a lifestyle. That way I would never get tired of it. No one could never get tired of sleeping I suppose, so if I set my mind on diabetes as a lifestyle, it was more likely to be succeeded. I also tried to look my life in a bigger picture because indeed it looked very hard piece by piece but in the bigger picture, life is strangely fair. I kept listening to my favorite song from Monty Python; it is called "Always Look on the Bright Side of Life". This song really cheered me up.

Some things in life are bad
They can really make you mad
Other things just make you swear and curse.
When you're chewing on life's gristle
Don't grumble, give a whistle
And this'll help things turn out for the best...

And...always look on the bright side of life...
Always look on the light side of life...

If life seems jolly rotten
There's something you've forgotten
And that's to laugh and smile and dance and sing.
When you're feeling in the dumps
Don't be silly chumps
Just purse your lips and whistle - that's the thing.

And...always look on the bright side of life...
Always look on the light side of life...

For life is quite absurd
And death's the final word
You must always face the curtain with a bow.
Forget about your sin - give the audience a grin
Enjoy it - it's your last chance anyhow.

So always look on the bright side of death
Just before you draw your terminal breath

Life's a piece of shit
When you look at it
Life's a laugh and death's a joke, it's true.
You'll see it's all a show
Keep 'em laughing as you go
Just remember that the last laugh is on you.

And always look on the bright side of life...
Always look on the right side of life...
(Come on guys, cheer up!)
Always look on the bright side of life...
Always look on the bright side of life...
(Worse things happen at sea, you know.)
Always look on the bright side of life...
(I mean - what have you got to lose?)
(You know, you come from nothing - you're going back to nothing.
What have you lost? Nothing!)
Always look on the right side of life...